teman sejati sukar di cari

kadang2 rasanya hidup macam yang terbaik atau tersempurna..rasa segalanya indah bila hidup dipenuhi dengan cinta, kasih sayang dan kegembiraan terutama dari orang2 yg tersayang.

for me, I feel grateful bila saya dapat memberikan yang terbaik untuk mereka2 yang memerlukan. hati rasa sangat gembira bila dapat membantu kawan2 yang memerlukan.
I'm the type of person who feels bad when I cant do anything to help others. I will try my very best to help and after few attempts I still cant help then I will tell very regretfully that I 'm sorry that I cant help. Tapi kalau saya betul2 dapat tolong saya tolong sepenuh hati dan tenaga saya dengan ikhlas. Bukan untuk disanjung atau dipuji tapi saya rasa saya ada tanggungjawap untuk cuba membantu.

Tapi sangat mengecewakan bila kita sudah berikan segala bantuan tapi ni orang tidak tau menghargai atau mengenang budi. Kadang2 dia ignore kita macam kita nda wujud ni. Adooii jenis apa ba orang macam begini ni? Paling teruk kalau kita bantu dari segi kewangan..suda la kita bagi pinjam tanpa kenakan apa2 bunga atau syarat..dan tanpa certain period tuk dia bayar..dia treat benda tu macam yang kita ni cop duit. Kadang2 bila saya becakap dengan dia, dia punya muka tu macam yang nda mo dengar saja.. kalau benci sangat dengan saya napa pandai mo minta tolong saya kan...tapi suda la minta simpati dengan orang lepas tu layan orang macam sampah saja.

Saya jenis yang tidak berkira ba kalau orang ni tau jaga hati..tapi suda la minta simpati, simpati tu ok lagi tapi terang2 cakap minta pinjam duit bukan sikit banyak ba..tapi layan orang macam la saya yang berhutang dengan dia..
suda kita anggap orang ni macam kawan macam saudara suda tapi dia buat kita macam yang orang teda guna...Bukan minta dihormati tapi at least kalau turn saya pula yang dalam masalah cuba la ba fahami.

Orang macam begini ni memang tidak layak dapat kebaikkan orang lain...Saya tau saya bukan la baik sangat tapi sekurang kurangnya saya jaga hati orang yang banyak mebantu saya..Ntah la mungkin bagi dia bantuan sia tu hanya macam semut...Semoga dia sedar la dengan sikap dia tu...Baru sia nampak sekarang kenapa dia hanya ada sebilangan saja kawan2 yang rapat dengan dia...

its a big shock to us...i heard before, once, twice, I'm not sure but heard that he's having a girlfriend..no better not to call girlfriend because the lady is only few years older than me..but definitely far younger than my mom...AFFAIR!!!

damn!! hurt so much..cant take it when my own dad said that he hate us, his children. he have 2 grandchild now..soon will become 3..how could a father says that he hate his family, his children..

my gosh..divorce? why now? it's so unreasonable..is that why he's having an affair?
lately, he did not return home..no idea where does he stay..maybe that lady's house...pity to my mom...
he slapped me on my face when he found out that I was involved in a marriage affair..but now he's doing the same thing..breaking the rules? is this how to teach?

so unbelievable..God please protect my mom, please guide hear and give her the strength. give us love God so that we can spread more love to my mom thus she will not feel alone because she's having us...

~ Faith Defeats Worry ~
Worry makes us see things
That aren't really there at all,
Worry makes us cripples
Before we even fall.
Worry causes problems
Where there should be just peace -
Trust God to find the answers
That make the worries cease...

What should we tell my nephew and niece when they ask "where is kungkung?" what should we tell them? they wont understand, they will keep on asking...
what kind of father is that,, hating his children, his family? when is the time we the children never love him..maybe we never say it out but what we did for him, everything is because of love..we give something without mention it...he never say he loves us either but when he give us something or buy for us something he always mention..he did mentioned "anak teda guna!" "sial punya anak" when he's angry, when he scolded us..but still we never hate him because we know whatever it is he still our dad...this is very hard for us..not a divorce..no...